Thanksgiving Traditions

Thanksgiving isn't a holiday I look forward to because my family is crazy...hence the douche blog.

The last two years my father has told me to eff off. Of course he said the actual word, but I will edit it out and use eff instead so that in a hundred years eff can be the first three letter curse word.

With that being said I'm thinking that if my dad tells me to eff off this year I'm considering it a tradition.

See the last two years he told me to eff off because I was sitting in HIS chair. I didn't know he had a chair, but what usually happens is I end up doing everyone else a favor by cramming myself into the smallest space around the dining room table in the cramped dining room. Then when my father yells at me for being in his chair and orders me to move, I do him another favor by relaying to him (since apparently he's not seeing it) that his 300 + lb ass is not going to fit there, and he needs to sit elsewhere, hence the eff off. Naturally I say it with a little more class than that...just a little....

I also may have some friends coming for Thanksgiving, which should be interesting since my family has no filters on what they should or should not say in front of/or to people they don't know. Politeness doesn't exist within these family walls.

I remember last time I had a friend over my father asked him if he was gay. Awkward.

In which case my friend responded with a surprising, "I don't know, maybe."????? and we're still waiting for the closet to swing open on that one?!?

Oh, family traditions, can't wait to see what happens this year. I'll keep you posted!